commandments

Today was a commandment-y day. I have two funny kid stories. Both strangely having to do with the ten commandments (shh... that didn't happen in a public school)

So, a second grader comes up to me about to burst into tears, her charm broke from her bracelet. I don't really look at the charm and brush her off with a "if you put it in your pocket I am sure mom can fix it when you get home." She brings it back up when her teacher gets there. "My charm broke" Her teacher perfectly calmly said, "Sarah, that is the third time you have broken the ten commandments today. Why don't I keep them for you until it is time for you to go home." I almost cracked up, but I kept a straight face.

This morning I was trying (with varying degrees of success) to get my morning group to do math. DJ actually did one math problem accurately. This was a huge success. He is a big fan of filling in the blank with whatever number leaps into his head, after randomly carrying some ones and borrowing some different numbers just to make it look like he did some work. It doesn't matter the problem. He will carry numbers all over the page (whether or not there are actually any problems that require carrying. Anthony is not a big fan of doing anything. His favorite method of finding answers is to glance at any papers around him and go with majority. Maurice (I love Maurice, my kind of kid) thinks this tendency is great to play with. So he will work out the whole problem fevorishly, making a deliberate mistake somewhere along the line, excitedly call out the wrong answer, get Anthony to write it down, and when asked to explain how he got the wrong answer, will go through step by step and then when he gets to his mistake, erases and explains. being the good teacher I am, I question, why did you change? "Because I added instead of multiplied so Anthony would not get the right answer." Anthony isn't actually all that dumb, so he picks up on Maurice's strategy. But Maurice switches it up and half of the time he does it right and half wrong, so there can't be any prediction... They make me laugh.

But anyway, this morning, Anthony tells me that he shouldn't have to do anything he doesn't want to do. And not only that, but he is guaranteed the right to not do anything he doesn't want to in the "fifth commandment." I, of course, say, "but isn't that the one that says 'honor thy father and thy mother'" He says, "oh, it must be that other 5th thing" "the fifth ammendment?" "Yeah, that's it" "isn't that the right to a fair trial or something like that?" "oh, never mind", and he copies Maurice's wrong answer. Not only can I teach kids math (evidently quite well...) but I can also work in bible study, and US government into my lesson. I am the most amazing teacher ever.

Wednesday, I even introduced Anthony to the sad truth that chores don't end at 18. He was quite excited that he would be done with chores in just 6 more years. Being the wise woman I am, I ask, "do you ever plan on getting married." "Duh, I'm cute, I'll get a wife" "And she will never ask you do do any chores?" "I'm doomed," says the brilliant one. Krystal says, "I'll just have lots of kids, so I don't have any chores. ha." I couldn't help laughing at her. I broke the news gently to her, that no matter how many kids you have you will still have to assign chores and re do the things they mess up, and do the things they can't do. You never escape... I burst their innocent little bubble... you may wonder when in all of this I teach math, sometimes so do I...